Overall, this is a well-structured and informative speech that effectively highlights the issue of mental health among postgraduate students. The use of statistics from reliable sources strengthens the argument and adds credibility to the message.
However, there are a few areas where improvements can be made. Firstly, it would have been helpful to provide some examples or personal anecdotes to illustrate the challenges faced by graduate students. This could help to make the speech more relatable and engaging for the audience.
Secondly, while the suggestions for addressing this issue are useful, they lack specificity. For example, what specific support services should universities provide? How much funding should governments allocate towards research or teaching assistantships? Providing more concrete recommendations could make the speech more actionable and effective.
Finally, the conclusion could have been stronger. Rather than simply restating the main points, it would have been more impactful to leave the audience with a call-to-action or a memorable quote that inspires them to take action.
In summary, this is a strong speech that effectively addresses an important issue. To improve it further, consider incorporating personal anecdotes or examples, providing more specific recommendations for addressing the issue, and ending with a stronger conclusion.
